Palentine’s Day

I have to let off a quick rant. It’s Valentine’s Day today. You know, Day of Lurrrrv and Romance and Red Hearts and Pink Flowers. And invariably, there’s going to be a few Bah Humbugs (okay, wrong season – maybe curmudgeons, then?) who call for a boycott of the holiday, and complain about how all this talk of love and romance only makes those of us who don’t have anyone who brings them roses and chocolates feel worse about that fact. So therefore, they say, we should not celebrate it at all. Ban this foolishness! Down with red-foil-wrapped chocolates and cinnamon hearts!

“Bah!” I say to them, “Humbug!” (that does have a nice ring to it, seasonal or not). Yes, all right, I agree that the commercialism of Valentine’s Day is flat-out ridiculous, and that spending money and making empty gestures is not what love is about. (In fact, a few years ago I wrote a blog post about it.) And of course I feel for those for whom the day, like many other holidays, brings up painful memories of lost loved ones, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. The pain of grief is a whole other topic.

The thing is this: just because you don’t have that one romantic partner in your life who neatly conforms to all of society’s extremely limited ideas of what love consists of it doesn’t mean you can’t celebrate a Day of Love, and/or let others celebrate it. Just because I’m not a grandmother doesn’t mean I can’t participate in my friend’s joy at her grandson’s birthday. Being European doesn’t mean I can’t celebrate Chinese New Year’s or enjoy watching the Asian community celebrating it. Not having a romantic-gestures-delivering partner doesn’t mean I can’t embrace Valentine’s Day.

Our world is bleak enough as it is—let’s celebrate all we can. And let’s especially celebrate love in all its manifestations. I just learned the terms “Galentine’s” and “Palentine’s”, celebrating your gal friends and pals—what a great concept. Friends, family, parents, children, uncles, aunts, cousins, second-cousins-by-marriage-once-removed, and yes, husbands, wives, girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers—let’s enjoy each other and the relationships we have. Let’s revel in the joy of love and romance and mushy sentiment, because, let’s face it, it makes us feel good, and it literally makes life happen. How great is that?

So bring on the flowers and chocolates (though perhaps not the promises you don’t intend to keep, but the gift of a giant library full of books would always be welcome). Let’s put a counterpoint of Love and Celebration out into the darkness.

Life, the Universe, and the Day of Love. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Pals

The Price of Love

IMG_20160730_145258700_HDROur darling Johnny, Tri-Pawed, Long John Charcoal, Twitticus, Fuzzy, Silly-Cat died last night. He got sick sometime Sunday night, just kept getting worse and worse. We took him to the vet, who suspected FIP (a fatal cat virus) and did blood tests to that effect; but it turned out not to be that, so today she was going to do an ultrasound to see what it might be. But he just quietly slipped away sometime in the night.
In a sense, I’m glad it’s over – these last few days have been stressful, to say the least. Because, you see, we loved that cat. He was really special. It might sound like playing favourites, but – okay, it’s playing favourites. Cats are not children, who depend on your love for their wellbeing, so I don’t feel a smidgen of guilt for loving one special cat more than, perhaps, another.
And it really is that, love, I mean. Johnny was a wonderful cat – affectionate, cute, funny, a little silly, quite vocal (purr, rumble, chirp, coo, squeak, purrrrr…), and all around great to have as a part of our family. We’re so glad we brought him home from the SPCA, that October day four years ago (you can read that story here). Having him around has given us so much pleasure, so much love.
And the price for that is the pain of having to say goodbye. The more you love, the more it hurts to let go. But it’s worth it – loving is worth every single tear it costs.
So, early this morning, as the sun rose over the hills, I put Johnny in a box and ran my hands one more time over his thick, velvety black fur.
Goodbye, darling Johnny. I’m so very grateful for the love we got to experience because of you.

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